ooh-la-la.
i hasten to laugh at everything
for fear of being obliged to weep
laughters and tears are both reponses
to fustration and exhaustion
laughter gives us distance
it allows us to step back from an event
deal with it and then move on
but i too believe those who don't know
how to weep with their whole heart
don't know how to laugh either.
one of the worse feelings in the entire world is knowing that you arent good enough,
what's even worse is knowing at the same time that you'll never be.
Monday, November 29, 2004
blogging... so long din update.. internet down again!!! at denise's place today...
shit.. there's soooooooooooo many things tt i din update... like my bday celebration on 20 nov.. it rawks okie!! for more info.. read denise's blog.. muhaha... lurve ya..
today went working n saw SYLVESTER SIM!!!!!! managed to sneak out from my store n 'bio' sly.. muhahaha... he's sooooooooooooo cute!!!!!!!!!!!! he wore a red n blue adidas sweater, sunglasses n white visor... he's sooooooooooooo cute!!!! taufik oso very cute...... heehee... i wanna watch FINALS!!! LIVE!!!! I WANNA GO INDOOR STADIUM!!! I WANNA SEE MAIA LEE!!! argh~
sianx... going home soon... days w/out internet SUX!!!!!!!
yea.. singlehood rawks~ muhahaha...
oh ya.. there's this new part timer at my store.. his name is Sean.. NO! HER name is Sean.. its a SHE... hehs... get me? but Sean is cute lahx... erm... really cute.. muhaha.. hey, im str8... addictive cuteness.. hahahahahahahaha!!!!
tts all lahx... going home le.. haix.. buaix...!!!!
nights
*i wont be alone. || 1:00 PM
Saturday, November 20, 2004
Your crazy but, fun to hang out with:) Sometimes
you go nuts over a question(lol) Also you don't
care what you look like. As long as your fun
and have lots of friends:) Your one of a kind:)
You want a sweet guy. Who'ld take you anywhere.
Like Japan!!! Wow I would like a guy like that
too:) Also he looks so cute in japanese
clothing:)
Your a Fall. Your cool and sweet. You love the
leaves when they fall to your feet in swirls.
Also when you rake the leaves you listen to the
soft rustling sound of the gentle breeze. Your
calm and care-free:)
brought u by.. http://quizilla.com
good nights
*i wont be alone. || 6:52 PM
oh ya.. one more entry to thanks de pple who wished me belated bday...
meiling
yunn tian
peng chuan
ivy
jojo
samy
thank u pple~
its all ur wishes tt supported me.. thankx.. a lonely bday might still be gd wid all ur wishes..
millions thankx..
*i wont be alone. || 3:50 PM
blogging.. gosh..
luckily.. managed to haf some fun today.. balanced up abit of my unhappiness ytd.. thou there's still someone out there trying to make me mad.. thank god im immuned to it.. didnt really spoil my day today.. thank god!!
went to town wid denise n ling.. cool.. its a sudden decision lahx.. cos im too sick at home lahx.. den wanna show off my Osmose dress.. whoops.. no lahx.. haha.. juz wanna wear my bday pressie my mummy bought.. haha.. ok... we ate our dinner at Marche.. cool.. haha.. oh ya.. b4 tt saw jojo tan!! wahaha.. miss her like mad!! den she psycho us join de Zodiac Ladies.. my god~ den i joined wid denise lohx.. ling is already a member le.. haha.. den continue walk arnd town lohx.. take neoprints.. cool.. its nice~ haha.. den after tt took a bus home le.. sianx lahx.. oh ya.. when we r heading to de bus stop, we saw da SOD, sisters of distruction.. haha.. they r, kailin, berlin, elieen, jiangwei, ailian, linying.. tink all of them r there bahx.. juz toking to kailin.. nv really notice de rest... but they r cool! haha..
haix.. juz reached home den ivy called n ask me to eat supper wid her.. haha.. den go out again lohx.. wahaha.. den she kns.. say wanna eat supper den only eat 7-11 de mashed potato.. kaox.. haha.. piangz.. after tt still wanna meet to walk her home sia.. kaox.. dotx.. haha..
oh ya.. thanks denise.. for finding this song for me.. lurve it to bits.. thanks to u n ling to be by my side today.. if not, my day will still be bad.. thanks..
ok lahx.. shall not stay on anymore.. gotta rest well tonight.. n haf gr8 fun tml! tml is my day! no one is going to ruin it.. yea~
gd nights..
*i wont be alone. || 3:41 PM
Friday, November 19, 2004
blogging.. wat a BDAY!
went to town wid a bunch of gr8 frens.. ate lunch at a posh restaurant.. after went shopping almost at every possible shop.. bought all de stuffs tt i liked.. so rich.. after tt went for a evening movie.. de show was gr8.. den went to Newton n ate dinner, after tt went to KBox n enjoyed!!
perfect day? how i wished de above is true..
today juz sux so totally!! and i emphasize, its SUCKS!!
birthdays r not for pathetic pple like me.. no one to celebrate wid.. this juz sucks lahx.. i hate 18 november.. its not a gd day lahx.. argh.. hope de steamboat on sat will balance de unhappiness today.. dun wish to say so much le.. tears r welling up.. shhh...
but, still need to thank my frens who wished me...
xinwei [thanks so much for wishing in SO advanced, haha]
leon [da handsome guy from ocom class]
yuzhen [cutey junior, thanks]
denise [my sister of blood~ yea]
griselda aka girly [my dearest childhood fren]
qianhui [same bday wor]
yenkai [thanks sooooo much]
wainian [tts sweet of ya to rmb my bday]
weixun [thanks so much]
sharon [miss ya loads]
lingz [my baobei meimei]
zhenwei [gr8ful to ya, my bday sux]
hui teng [thanks my dear]
shiyun [whoops, lurve ya]
my biological Mummy [thanks for da Osmose dress]
grace [another sister of blood]
pengzhi [surprised!]
sujun [my sweetie pie]
phui hae [gr8 sister]
vanessa[whoa~ miss ya pple]
peppermint [cute name eh?]
allan [thanks thai guy~]
sherwin [nice fren from friendster]
don zhuo [thanks wor~]
bleahs, so detailed liddat.. muhaha..
whoo.. quite a long list.. but a special thanks to xun-... was talking to her juz now.. told her tt i got a bad bday.. n her bday wasnt tt gr8 as well.. den she left me a testi.. aww, how sweet.. lurve all those pple! yea.. another special thanks to yenkai.. was so damn shocked when i saw him at my doorstep.. i din expected it at all.. but thanks.. lurve tt tee alot.. its pink! yea...
hope saturday will be better lahx.. oh yah.. thanks denise for posting such a sweet entry on ur blog.. lurve ya, lurve da bday cake.. muacks..
gd nights peeps..
*i wont be alone. || 5:29 PM
Wednesday, November 17, 2004
blogging...
whoa~ final epsiode for The Champion today.. wat a ending.. haha.. still haf to vote.. of cos is kaiwei n jingwen together better lahx.. haha.. cfm plus chop lahx.. haha..
overslept today again.. 2 days in a row.. had to take a cab to JP in order not to be late.. haix.. took cab for 2 days.. sucking my blood! argh.. bobian lahx.. haix haix.. today sales is bad lahx.. no crowd at all sia.. where de hell did all those pple gone? tml still gotta work.. muz not be late AGAIN!! after work tml gonna meet mummy.. yea!!! she's gonna bring me to haf lunch n shop for my birthday pressie.. gotta ask her buy lotsa clothes for me.. muhaha.. miss mummy too.. long time nv see her liao.. hmmm.. haha.. eeks.. so mushy.. haha..
bday coming SOON!!!!! 2 more days!! maybelx is turning 17!! sweet 16 gone!! growing up 17!! soon i will hold my 'silver key' n den my 'golden key'.. yea yea!! ttm.. haha..
i swear im going to haf fun on my bday n celebration!! bday last yr sux!!!! o lvls!!!! argh.. thank god there's still Toro to brighten up my dull bday last yr.. haha.. still remember damn clearly.. last yr de 18 nov.. im having my A.maths paper 2 & chem paper.. after A.maths paper, meet prawnie to send Toro off to Taipei.. den both of us rush back to skool for our chem paper!!! hahahahahahahaha!! my A.maths results still got a B3 lehx.. haha.. muz be Toro lahx.. my motivation.. haha.. bleahs..
met lingz juz now.. @ lot 1.. to take my pay at Seiyu.. so little nia.. sianx.. haha.. den go gaigai awhile.. haha.. ate alot of food.. mochi.. prawn dumpling.. siew mai.. bubbletea.. ah.. i can see calories knocking my door.. haha.. so long din see her liao.. miss her!!! den she came my hse take MYP Valentine de vcds.. den i helped her do her bloggy stuff.. haha.. so funnie..
yawns.. tml still haf to work early.. im still up.. haha.. but im NOT going to be late.. maybelx swear.. haha.. i tink when i blow off de candles on my bday cake 2 days later, one of my 3 wishes will be : i wish tt i wont be late for work n skool anymore.. haha.. wishes come true!! haha..
diyy tagged n say tt when skool reopens, pple will luff at my hair again.. haha.. funnie mehx? fashion highlight only wat.. haha.. if my hair is funny.. den wat abt denise? oops.. haha..
gd nights pple.. smooch*
*i wont be alone. || 3:18 PM
Monday, November 15, 2004
blogging again.. whooyea~
bleach n dye my hair to my fav color!!! PINK~
this is de side view of it.. look quite okie lahx.. hmmm.. still can see my previously highlighted color.. de hairdresser keep on telling to dye it black.. but i insist.. i lurve it so much.. like tt den special mahx.. muhaha.. but not de pink i wan.. bleahs.. but will fade off de.. yea..
how? wahaha...
today work at Jurong Point.. sianx!! no chair to sit.. stand for soooooo long.. kns.. haix.. tml muz sit sia!!! haha.. finished work le go gaigai lohx.. den bought a denim jacket from RED2, $42... not too ex.. not too cheap too.. my heart quite pain when im paying for it.. but den keep on looking at it.. realise tt i lurve it to bits... cos de butterfly is pink.. de string on de whole jacket is PINK~ whooya
on one of de collars got a white n pink crystal butterfly which look like this~
lurve it.lurve it.lurve it.lurve it.lurve it.
smooch.smooch.smooch.smooch.smooch.
haix.. actually wanna do manicure de.. den buy le this jacket starting to haf 2nd thoughts.. haix.. still feel like doing lehx.. so long nv manicure le.. shld i? shld i not? argh~
buaix~
*i wont be alone. || 5:12 PM
Tuesday, November 09, 2004
yo~
here's de pictures of my trip to Farmart...! whoa~
haha.. this is de duckies we lurve at farmart~ esp. de small one..
de veri nice ice cream.....
"yums.."
"hey.. im eating.. dun take my pic!"
"ah~ oops~"
......... poof.. gone~
our
[u really tink this is self-taken?]
self-taken
photos
sisters of blood.. whooya~
denise looks so funny, bleahs.. hmmm, i like myself in this pic~
haha.. my nice nice de ear-rings..
self-taken in KBox.. lying on grace.. smooch*
self-taken on de way home.. look blur but nice.. hmmm..
*i wont be alone. || 1:29 PM
Monday, November 08, 2004
a few days since i updated le.. hmmm... days r still so dead n lifeless.. haix.. nth much to spice up my life.. bleahs..
wahaha... went to Farmart last thurs, 4th nov, wid my sisters of blood.. denise & gracie.. whoo~ miss da gurls.. haven seen each other since tt gr8 day to Wild Wild Wet.. n finally.. we had another day of fun.. wahaha..
taken when we were waiting for de shuttle bus outside Lot 1..
[hmmm, where's grace looking? haha.. tink she's looking at herself in de screen...]
we were all supposed to meet at 12pm.. hahahahaha.. but in de end, ALL of us were late.. by de time de 3 of us met, its already 1+pm le.. haha.. after lunch n all, we finally arrived at Farmart.. wahaha.. n denise, de driver aint going to kidnap us okie?! dumb dumb.. hee..
lazy to say all de details le.. no one will read everything in my entry anyway.. haha.. we were really entertained by all de poultries n those rude goats.. bleahs.. poor grace, din manage to take pics wid de goat in de end.. haix.. haha.. de trip there was short actually.. there isnt really much things for us to see lehx.. haha.. but de doggies there really brighten up my day~! lurve them to bits.. haha.. denise scared of dogs, so she din went into de pet shop.. wasted~! de doggies r so damn ke ai!!!!!!!!! there's a poodle damn cute lohx.. argh.. how i wish it belong to me.. haix.. will miss it..
after tt went to de little 'cafe' to eat ice cream.. de ice cream is damn nice.. er, mine was nice lahx.. haha.. den take alot of funny pics sia.. bleahs.. haha.. shall upload soon after denise send me.. haha..
den its raining like so heavily.. so we were tinking of places to go, things to do.. actually wanted to watch movie de.. but den we ended up in KBox.. whoa~ first time go KBox wid my sisters of blood.. cool! everything is so fun..
i have you to be with,
everything will be easy...
my sisters of blood.. now, later, forever... a lifetime... hopefully..
whoa.. today worked until damn tired.. this morning 5am den slp.. den supposed to wake up at 10am de.. den late loh.. 1045am den wake up.. den definitely late for work.. so take cab.. argh~ $$ fly.. haix.. tml haf to wake up early AGAIN! haf a staff meeting for BOC.. bleahs.. boring.. haix.. meeting for wat de hell! stupid lahx.. haix.. haven even receive my cheque lohx.. kns.. wanna 'swallow' my $$ izit.. haha..
yawns.. slping soon le.. update again.. will upload de pics SOON!!!
*i wont be alone. || 4:06 PM
Tuesday, November 02, 2004
found a rather nice poem from internet.. well, de words dun really relate me.. but its really nice...
She couldnt stand the silence
She couldnt stand the tears
She couldnt stand her life
After only 16 years
He was her entire world
She gave him all she possessed
He did the same in return
They were thought to be obsessed
Their love couldnt be reached
Couldnt be touched by any other
They were all they needed
They only wanted each other
From two they become one
They made each other whole
They filled each other's voids
They filled each other's souls
Everything was perfect
Everything was great
Till one damning day
They were told they'd have to wait
Her parents were moving her
To a distant place
They'd be torn apart
Couldnt see each other's face
They swore they'd make it work
Vowed to stay together
Didnt care about the distance
They'd be together forever
She gave it all she had
She did her very best
But he still slipped away
He didnt pass the test
While she was thinking of him
He had found another
He said he couldnt do it
He talked it over with his mother
She was devastated
Her heart was torn straight out
She'd been such a fool
She should have listened to her doubt
From then on they stopped talking
Never spoke again
While he was with his new girl
She was dreaming of him
Everyday she'd cry
She tried to fight off all the pain
But the hurting never stopped
Just shot through every vein
Months went by since the ending
But she only grew worse
She couldnt accept wat happened
This was Love's curse
It finally overtook her
She couldnt stand it anymore
She grabbed a picture of him
And snuck out the front door
She walked into the woods
Found a secluded place
Kept thinking of the past
And how she'd been replaced
Hours later she was found
In a pool of her blood
And beside her they found
His picture in the mud
On the back read her reason
Why she took her life
What he did to her
It seemed he had held the knife
Though physically he didnt kill her
He tore her soul apart
It was obvious how she did
It was from a broken heart
so sad, isnt it? haix.. guys always hurt gurls like nobody business liddat.. haha.. well, perhaps not all guys.. but majority bahx.. gurls, agree? wahaha.. this poem indeed is very very heartbreaking.. haha.. if i got more nice poems, i will post okie? haha..
oh ya.. got a link here... de video clip is damn amazing.. haha... 100% no virus... but only can watch lehx.. cannot save to lappy.. haha..
http://www.iparty.org.tw/service/dv/show.phtml?id=Poseidon&pid=48
haha.. enjoy this link peeps..
nth much to write le.. haha.. shall update again worx.. nitex...
*i wont be alone. || 4:53 PM
Monday, November 01, 2004
blogging.. haix.. everyday is a tiring day for me.. work n work...
wahaha.. today work at Seiyu Lot 1.. 1o long hrs!!! torturing~! den manage to sell 9 pairs of shoes.. which totally cost slightly more than 400 bucks.. i din sell shoes b4.. dunno whether is this sales consider good or bad.. haha... heck.. but its was actually quite pleasant lahx.. go up n down de escalator, climb up n down de ladder to get shoes, will it help to burn calories?! wahaha... de pple there is nice.. n i might be getting chance to tutor my colleague's son.. wahaha.. xtra income again~ whoohu! pray hard i get de job~ haha..
so sianx.. this whole week not working at BOC... haix.. pengzhi lahx.. tell him long long ago i cant work nite shift liao.. j8 lehx.. reach home wat time liao.. n some more The Champion still showing.. bleahs~ so bobian he haf to cancel my shift for this week n replan next week one lohx.. haix.. $$ fly fly~ haha.. good oso.. can let me relax for a week.. FINALLY!! haha.. can go do things tt i originally planned.. wahaha... yippee~ de most impt thing to do is.. go repair my baobei~~ my Samsung S200.. argh~ spoilt quite long le.. no time to service it.. finally got time le~ yea! miss my baobei.. miss de 'whoa' sound whenever i flipped open my fone.. juz miss it..
no slping yet.. catching The Bachelor 3 later at 2am.. haha.. its encore episode lahx.. haha.. but its nice.. season finale le.. haha.. thou i already noe who he chosen liao.. but still wanna watch.. bleahs~ oh yah.. haha.. SI results.. whooha~ my prayers r heard.. daphne n syl stay on but tt chrissy is kicked out!! damn him lahx.. he shld be kicked out last week de lohx.. den my Maia could stay on.. piangz.. haix.. now more n more kancheong liao.. tink next week will kick daphne out le.. abo jiu shi leandra bahx.. perhaps lahx.. haha.. heck~ haha...
so sianx.. toking to denise now.. miss her n grace like mad~ my sisters of blood.. haha.. next wekk there will be a bloody trip tp Farmart.. whoohu~ my plans n my ideas.. haha.. sianx sianx sianx sianx.. i need cash~ loads of cash!!! donald! when r u giving me my pay?!?!?! im robbing BOC soon!! -__-" luckily still haf Chevrons GT to support me.. haha.. yea~
aiya, nth more to write le.. buaix~
oh ya... now its already november le.. which means.....................................................................................
my bday coming veri veri veri veri soon!!!!!!!!! *hints
haha.. bday bday bday.. whooha~ so looking forward to tt gr8 day!
*i wont be alone. || 5:25 PM
she is she, nobody but SHE.
maybelyn.
18 november.
and...
she belongs to nowhere.
she loves...
she wishes for...
she doesnt know, either.
understand;
maybelyn;
speak;
mingle;
reminisce;
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