ooh-la-la.
i hasten to laugh at everything
for fear of being obliged to weep
laughters and tears are both reponses
to fustration and exhaustion
laughter gives us distance
it allows us to step back from an event
deal with it and then move on
but i too believe those who don't know
how to weep with their whole heart
don't know how to laugh either.
one of the worse feelings in the entire world is knowing that you arent good enough,
what's even worse is knowing at the same time that you'll never be.
Thursday, August 19, 2004
wat the hell!!!!!!! today is supposed to be a HAPPY day loh!!! wat the hell!!! den now!! today juz sux!! everything juz went wrong!! so wrong!! ah!!
firstly, today supposed to meet yk rite?! den?! meeting kana postponed again! but i dun blame him.. i noe he's busy.. but, anyone noes how disappointed am i? how upest am i? oh no!! maybe its juz fate.. we r fated not to see each other bah!! y? y fate?
then, another thingy!! big thingy!! abt de guy tt im always blogging abt!! ah!! wth!! it seems tt he wont ever tok much to me ANYMORE!! y? y muz he care? care about wat other pple tink n say? we all live for ourselves.. not for others.. juz bcos of wat they tink, u decide not to tok to me! is there smth wrong wid u?! or there's smth wrong wid ME? ya, ME!! i noe things will end up like this, isnt it.. i noe things definitely will go wrong.. but i still insist.. i promise to tok less to u.. but i failed.. juz bcos i care.. this afternoon, i juz blogged saying i didnt tok to u for 3 days!! now, its forever i supposed!! is toking to mi so hard? n now, yes i tink im damn irritating!! fine!! i swear, im not going to initiate a conversation.. i swear!! i could tok to u so freely in de past its bcos i dun care wat pple say!! y cant u do tt too? now fine!! fine!! fine!! but still, i did not regret agreeing to wei de condition bcos of u.. i still tink its all worthwhile.. n once again, i tink its all fate..
FATE!! this thing call fate is realli driving mi nuts!!!!! fate is always fooling me!! denise, i noe u definitely agree!!! ah... fate!! fate!! fate!! fate!! fate!! i hate FATE!!!! fate, predestined!! gif mi a break!!!
::: ming yun, wei shen me ni yao zuo nong wo, wo you de zui ni ma? ::: ming yun, wei shen me zong shi ba wo xiang yao de dong xi qiang zou, wo you de zui ni ma? ::: ming yun, wei shen me ni gei bie ren xing fu, dan cong lai bu gei wo, wo you de zui ni ma? :::
*i wont be alone. || 2:00 PM
she is she, nobody but SHE.
maybelyn.
18 november.
and...
she belongs to nowhere.
she loves...
she wishes for...
she doesnt know, either.
understand;
maybelyn;
speak;
mingle;
reminisce;
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